Incident in a Bath

The speculation began almost immediately.

Was there only one person in the bath, or perhaps significantly more?

Was he (or were they) stuck there for minutes? or hours? or many long years?

Were the rumours about the secret properties of the plughole true?

Was the incident the direct cause of the total solar eclipse, or was it perhaps the other way round?

Why was there a mysterious spike in bath sales in Cardigan in the succeeding days?

Was it true that those involved all emerged speaking in tongues?

Did they all emerge at all or was there, as the press always claimed, a ‘lost one’?

Was there ever an ‘escape through the window’ or was this just a tabloid ploy?

Why did the wet footmarks on the floor appear to lead into the locked bathroom cupboard?

Is there still a song, penned in the aftermath of the incident, that has never been released?

Even after all these years, these questions remain unanswered.

Perhaps they always will.